A Cow Walked Up the Side of the Hotel
A heifer and a bull walked into a hotel bar and sat down.
"What'll it be?" said the bartender.
"A couple of tall glasses of milk and alcohol," replied the bull.
"I don't need him to order for me," said the heifer, "just give me alcohol."
"Prove you can handle your drinks," said the skeptical bartender.
"Cow How?" replied the bull and the heifer at the same time.
"Take a sobriety test in advance," grinned the bartender.
"Again, Cow How?" said the bull and heifer in unison.
"One of you has to walk up the side of the hotel," instructed the bartender.
The bull and the heifer looked at each other, as if to figure out which one of them should do it.
Only they knew that the bull had been drinking all day and would probably fall down.
They wordlessly decided that the heifer would perform the test.
She leaned over to the bartender and whispered something in his ear.
Then the heifer got up and everyone in the bar followed her outside.
Within a minute, she strolled up the side of the hotel, as sure footed as can be, and stood there.
The bull turned to the bartender and said with a drunken smile, "So where's my damn drink?"
The bartender frowned and said "All I can do is give you alcohol. The milk's in her udders upside the hotel."
The frustrated bull then remembered something. "What did she whisper to you?"
The bartender replied "She said you are always driving her up a wall. This time, she's not coming back down. You'll have to get your damn milk some udder place!"
Text and Images © Marc P. Anderson
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